Sunday, September 30, 2012

Freak Magnet Morning

So I blogged all about eating.  But let me tell ya, daily adventures that have nothing to do with food are just as entertaining.  Actually, probably more so!

The other day, I was taking my usual walk in Waterloo Park.  It was a gorgeous day!  Sun was out, birds were singing, deer and squirrels came up to me (ok, squirrels are begging for food and the deer were fenced in at the little zoo in the park), I felt like frikkin Snow White.  Except I am beige.  Beige hair, beige skin, same colour from head to toe...I have to be careful what furniture I sit on so people don't lose me.

Anyway, I approach this little group of trees that the path goes through.  As I approach, I see this middle-aged couple (and by middle-aged I will always mean people about 20 years older than me) at the opening on the other side sucking each other's faces off (in a kissing way, not a bath salts kind of way).  Necking.  Playing tonsil hockey.  Tongue Sumo Wrestling.  Completely oblivious to the world around them.  I would have no way to avoid them, right there, in the sunshine on the other side of the trees, in the open but blocking my way.  So, I shuffle and scuff my feet as I approach.  Nothing.  Except continued face sucking.  As I am almost close enough to join in, they finally notice me and stop, obviously embarrassed.  The woman sort of turns her head away, the guy looks squarely at me and apologetically mutters "I thought it was just us."  I just awkwardly responded "That's ok" and side-stepped around them and continued on my way.  Yep, that is right buddy, chances are at 11:45am on a bright, sunny day in a huge public park used by families, walkers, joggers and university students going to and from home and classes, you are probably alone.  What was I doing there?  Clearly I had the wrong park.  

And much to my glee, I got a good giggle when I got the the parking lot at the end of the path and saw only two cars there.  Oh reeeally?  You needed two cars to meet at the park, eh?  Married, eh?  But not to each other, you say???  hee hee hee.  Probably not the case, but made me wish I had the balls to turn around, go back and yell at the guy, "Oh, and that dinner date we had at 12:30 today?  It's OFF!!  We are through!!!"  That would have been awesome!  

I continued on my walk, and see Shigeki on his daily run.  We chatted for a bit and parted with a "See you back home."  I get to the end of the park where there is a small dam and waterfall next to a replica of an old grist mill.  The trees reflecting in the water...all so picturesque.  I get my camera out and start taking a few photos.  After a few minutes, I hear a voice next to me ask, "You getting some good pictures?"  Had a great chat with this friendly older fella, a construction worker from Ireland here on a project across the street.  Seemed like good people.  But towards the end of the conversation, he asked if we could have dinner and a chat sometime.  I was floored!  Had absolutely no idea what to say because my brain was too busy trying to process these thoughts: "Uh, am I actually getting hit on at the moment??  Are you friggin serious??  WTF??  Hahahahahahahahahaha!!"  I just danced around that, inwardly shook my head, smiled, made a bit more polite conversation and took off.  

I don't fully understand this internal freak magnet I have, where it came from or where I can find a surgeon to remove it.  Perhaps there is an app for that.

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